Flight maintenance logs

Discussion in 'Humor' started by Fmr jarhead, May 9, 2005.

  1. Fmr jarhead
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    Fmr jarhead Senior Member

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    Actual mainentance log entries:

    P = The problem logged by the pilot.
    S = The solution and action recorded by the engineers.

    P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
    S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

    P: Test flight OK, except autoland very rough.
    S: Autoland not installed on this aircraft.

    P: No. 2 propeller seeping prop fluid.
    S: No. 2 propeller seepage normal. Nos. 1, 3 and 4 propellers
    lack normal seepage.

    P: Something loose in cockpit.
    S: Something tightened in cockpit.

    P: Dead bugs on windshield.
    S: Live bugs on backorder.

    P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200-fpm descent.
    S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

    P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
    S: Evidence removed.

    P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
    S: DME volume set to more believable level.

    P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
    S: That's what they're there for!

    P: IFF inoperative.
    S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

    P: Suspected crack in windscreen.
    S: Suspect you're right.

    P: Number 3 engine missing.
    S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

    P: Aircraft handles funny.
    S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

    P: Target radar hums.
    S: Reprogrammed target radar with words.

    P: Mouse in cockpit.
    S: Cat installed.
     
  2. Mr. P
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    Mr. P Senior Member

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    We did have fun! :teeth:
     

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