basquebromance
Diamond Member
- Nov 26, 2015
- 109,396
- 27,004
- 2,220
- Banned
- #1
"here's the thing you have to understand about Lyin Ted: I like Lyin Ted more than most of my other colleagues like Lyin Ted. And I hate Lyin Ted. I like him a bit because he has a decent sense of humour. And he did pay me a modest compliment, even though it was some Machivalean ploy in service of his ambition to take over the world...he is simply an absolutely toxic coworker. he's the guy in your office who snitches to corporate about your March Madness pool and microwaves fish in the office kitchen. he is the Dwight Schrute of the Senate" - Creepy Al Frankenstein
"anyone who is for the assault weapons ban is engaged in sophistry!" Lyin Ted erupted at Frankenstein, sneering in his pugnacious way.
Lyin Ted also erupted at Feinstein:
"the assault weapons ban that used to be in effect, according to the DOJ 'failed to reduce the average number of victims per gun murder incident or multiple gunshot wounds victims'. now, that is the assessment of the DOJ in 94. that was the Janet Reno DOJ under Clinton that said the assault weapons ban was singularly ineffective. "
after a breathtakingly patronizing lecture, Lyin Ted continued:
"would Senator Feinstein deem it consistent to the Bill Of Rights for Congress to do the same thing we are contemplating with the 2nd Amendment and do it with the 1st Amendment? namely, would she consider it constitutional for Congress to specify that the First Amendment shall apply only to the following books, and shall not apply to the books that Congress has deemed outside of the protection of the Bill Of Rights?"
you get what he was trying to say, right? the bill would have outlawed assault weapons, while leaving other guns legal. and Lyin Ted was suggesting that this was equivalent to selectively banning books.
Feinstein erupted in response: "Number One, I'm not a 6th grader. second, i became mayor of San Fransisco after George Moscone was assassinated. in fact, i was the one who discovered Harvey Milk's body. i've been the bullets that implode!" she growled at Lyin Ted
at this point, Creepy Al Frankenstein interjected:
"well, I've got a book that I don't think the 1st Amendment would permit. it's called Ted Cruz Is A Pedophile. That would be libel. unless, of course, you are a pedophile. which we don't know."
the end!
this is all documented in Franken's book.
"anyone who is for the assault weapons ban is engaged in sophistry!" Lyin Ted erupted at Frankenstein, sneering in his pugnacious way.
Lyin Ted also erupted at Feinstein:
"the assault weapons ban that used to be in effect, according to the DOJ 'failed to reduce the average number of victims per gun murder incident or multiple gunshot wounds victims'. now, that is the assessment of the DOJ in 94. that was the Janet Reno DOJ under Clinton that said the assault weapons ban was singularly ineffective. "
after a breathtakingly patronizing lecture, Lyin Ted continued:
"would Senator Feinstein deem it consistent to the Bill Of Rights for Congress to do the same thing we are contemplating with the 2nd Amendment and do it with the 1st Amendment? namely, would she consider it constitutional for Congress to specify that the First Amendment shall apply only to the following books, and shall not apply to the books that Congress has deemed outside of the protection of the Bill Of Rights?"
you get what he was trying to say, right? the bill would have outlawed assault weapons, while leaving other guns legal. and Lyin Ted was suggesting that this was equivalent to selectively banning books.
Feinstein erupted in response: "Number One, I'm not a 6th grader. second, i became mayor of San Fransisco after George Moscone was assassinated. in fact, i was the one who discovered Harvey Milk's body. i've been the bullets that implode!" she growled at Lyin Ted
at this point, Creepy Al Frankenstein interjected:
"well, I've got a book that I don't think the 1st Amendment would permit. it's called Ted Cruz Is A Pedophile. That would be libel. unless, of course, you are a pedophile. which we don't know."
the end!
this is all documented in Franken's book.
