Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by chanel, May 12, 2010.
Extending Foster Care Past Age 18 - Newsweek.com
Why not 26? or 30?
Because keeping unskilled, angry teenagers in a flawed system for three more years will keep them from going homeless?
What is with California?
Well it looks like 27 other states are doing it. In KS, they are guaranteed 4 years of college. Might be worth kicking their ass to the curb at 17. Esp. If granny qualifies as a foster parent.
I just read an article by George Will about LA. He stated that 40 percent of LA county kids are in foster care. 40 percent!!!!
All of this is just so wrong. While I say it - "When you sign on for parenthood, you sign on for life," I don't think it should be taken in the context that you OWE your kids food, housing, clothing, education, insurance, etc. for the rest of your life. You "... sign on for life" because you're going to love them, worry about them, hope good things for them for the rest of your life. The whole purpose of good parenting is to give your kids the foundation and guidance they need to go forward with their life - minus the apron strings.
Guaranteeing 4 years of college? Is this just for foster kids or for all kids? Damn, I'm glad I don't live in Kansas. That financial burden alone should be enough to break the bank.
My children are free to live with me forever. I will never kick them out.
you would think, the foster care parents would have developed enough love for the children in their care to help them out finding a job, and taking care of them even if it is after they stop getting paid to do it...?
I don't know what kind of mother you must think I am ... but I haven't kicked any of my children out. They are all self-sufficient, but they all know that so long as I have a roof over my head they will have a roof, too. There's a difference between doing something you want to do for you children and being forced to do something for them.
Maybe I could set things out in terms you might understand better.
When you were in boot camp, did your DI wash your clothes for you? No.
You learned to wash them yourself.
Did your DI make your bed for you, or let you get away without making your bed, or let you toss your stuff all over the place? No.
You learned to make a tight bed and you damned sure didn't throw stuff all over the barracks - you folded your stuff up neatly and put it in your footlocker.
When you were out on the firing range and couldn't hit a target if it was two feet in front of you, did your DI put his arm around you and say, "Well, that's OK, Buddy, you can try it again tomorrow?" No.
You learned to aim, shoot and hit the damned target because your life and that of the guy next to you depended on it if you were ever in a war zone.
Did your DI ever carry your backpack up a hill for you? Did your DI ever let you sit down and rub your tired, blistered feet? No.
You carried that load on your own back and if you did rub your feet it was when you keeled over on your bed from exhaustion.
Your DI was your "surrogate parent." Everything you learned in boot camp was for your own good, your betterment. You learned to think on your feet, you learned self-control, you learned responsibility, you built a lot of character, you were reliable.
If you retired from the military, you did at least 20 years and I guarantee all of those 20 years were not spent in boot camp being waited on by your DI. You always had a roof over your head even if it was a tent - and you took care of your family when you married and the kids came along.
Those are the same principles of good parenting - you prepare your kids to go out into the world and be able to function on their own. If you coddle them, take care of them, support them well into adulthood - you're not doing them any favors. You're only turning them into weak, selfish, spoiled, lazy, irresponsible adults.
You would think. Unfortunately, there are a whole lot of foster parents out there who are in it strictly for the money. There are some foster parents who do love the kids, but there are a whole lot of them who have no business being around children in the first place.
Parents should teach children what they need to know or do in order to get a job - but only the child/job applicant can present themselves in a positive light at an interview.
And I repeat, no matter the circumstances, I will never turn my kids away.
You're not helping them by doing that.
My son was taught from the time I deemed him old enough to understand that he would have to get out in the world and support himself.
From his very first job, I helped him set up an IRA to put 10% of his gross pay into. Now he is in the habit and is always mindful of his finances and his obligations.
Just today, he asked me for a ride because his car was in the shop so I drove the 35 mile round trip. When I dropped him off he handed me 10 bucks for gas and said "Thanks, Pop."
He is 19 and I believe I have taught him well. This summer he started his own business. Not much but a contract labor thing but now instead of getting whacked with a self employment tax, he is avoiding it. His car is registered in the business name so he is maximizing his write offs. And he is still putting 10% away every month.
I don't have to support him anymore and what's best is he doesn't want me to.
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