Experts Warn We Have Only 12 Years Left Until They Change The Timeline On Global Warming Again

Discussion in 'Political Satire' started by Weatherman2020, Aug 1, 2019.

  1. Weatherman2020
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    Weatherman2020 Diamond Member

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    Climate experts have solemnly warned that we only have twelve years left until they change the dates on global warming again.

    "If we don't take action, then in 12 years we will have to explain why the world hasn't ended and come up with a new number," one UN scientist warned. "This is a very serious threat, and we urge everyone to hand control of the economy to the government immediately before we have no more time left to change the timeline again."

    The scientific consensus is that roughly 10-12 years from now, the world will be flooded with new doomsday predictions. This can all be avoided if we overhaul the economy and become socialists, according to non-political, unbiased sciencey type guys.

    "Should we not change our ways, our old predictions will melt, dangerously raising the chance of us having to move the goalposts again," said Al Gore. "Do you really want me to write another book, film another movie, and go on another tour in my private jet just because you dingbats couldn't be bothered to alter your lifestyles? I don't think so. Let's all get on board with this 12-year figure, or we'll have to push back the date again."

    Experts Warn We Have Only 12 Years Left Until They Change The Timeline On Global Warming Again
     
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  2. Billy_Kinetta
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    Billy_Kinetta Paladin of the Lost Hour Gold Supporting Member Supporting Member

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    It was 10 years in ... 1970.
     
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  3. Weatherman2020
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    Weatherman2020 Diamond Member

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    And in 2010 we had only 4 years to act.
     
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  4. MarathonMike
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    MarathonMike Platinum Member

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    Sounds like climate scientists have adopted Muammar Gadaffi's 'line of death' strategy with climate change. It is equally laughable.
     
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  5. Crixus
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    Crixus Gold Member

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    SHIT!
     

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