Eight Words with two Meanings

Discussion in 'Humor' started by Sandy73, May 13, 2004.

  1. Sandy73
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    Sandy73 Guest

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    Eight Words with two Meanings

    1. THINGY (thing-ee) n.
    Female... Any part under a car's hood.
    Male..... The strap fastener on a woman's bra.

    2. VULNERABLE (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj.
    Female.... Full y opening up one's self emotionally to another.
    Male.... Playing football without a cup.

    3. COMMUNICATION (ko-myoo-ni-kay-shon) n.
    Female... The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one's partner.
    Male.! .. Leaving a note before taking off on a fishing trip with the boys.
    4. COMMITMENT (ko-mit-ment) n.
    Female.... A desire to get married and raise a family.
    Male...... Trying not to hit on other women while out with this one.

    5. ENTERTAINMENT (en-ter-tayn-ment) n.
    Female.... A good movie, concert, play or book.
    Male...... Anything that can be done while drinking beer.

    6. FLATULENCE (flach-u-lens) n.
    Female.... An embarrassing byproduct of indigestion.
    Male...... A source of entertainment, self-_expression, male bonding.

    7 MAKING LOVE (may-king luv) n.
    Female...... The greatest _expression of intimacy a couple c! an achieve.
    Male.. Call it whatever you want, just as long as we do it.

    8. REMOTE CONTROL (ri-moht kon-trohl) n.
    Female.... A device for changing from one TV channel to another.
    Male... A device for scanning through all 375 channels every 5 minutes.


    AND;
    He said . . . I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it.
    She said . . . You wear pants don't you?



    He said . . ...... Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
    She said . .. That's a good idea - you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart!

    He said . . . What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?
    She said . . ......Turn sideways and look in the mirror!



    He said . . ...... Why don't you tell me when you have an orgasm?
    She said . . .. I would but you're never there.



    He said . . . Why did the man cross the road?
    She said . . He heard the chicken was a slut.



    He said . . ...... Why don't women blink during foreplay?
    She said .. . .. They don't have time



    He said . . . How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
    She said ...... . . We don't know; it has never happened.



    He said . . . Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good- looking?
    She said ...... . . They already have boyfriends.



    She said...What do you call a women who knows where her husband is every night?
    He said . . . A widow.



    He said . .. . Why are married women heavier than single women?
    She said . . . Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.



    SEND THIS TO A SMART WOMAN WHO NEEDS A LAUGH AND TO
    THE GUYS YOU THINK THEY CAN HANDLE IT!
     
  2. Joz
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    Joz Senior Member

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