Dennis Miller Talks About Israel

ajwps

Active Member
Nov 7, 2003
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Houston, TX
For those who don't know, Dennis Miller is a comedian who has a show called Dennis Miller Live on HBO. He is not Jewish. He recently said the following about the Mideast situation:

"A brief overview of the situation is always valuable, so as a service to all Americans who still don't get it, I now offer you the story of the Middle East in just a few paragraphs, which is all you Really need.

Here we go:

The Palestinians want their own country. There's just one thing about that: There are no Palestinians. It's a made up word. Israel was called Palestine for two thousand years. Like "Wiccan," "Palestinian" sounds ancient but is really a modern invention. Before the Israelis won the land in the 1967 war, Gaza was owned by Egypt, the West Bank was owned by Jordan, and there were no "Palestinians."

As soon as the Jews took over and started growing oranges as big as basketballs, what do you know, say hello to the "Palestinians," weeping for their deep bond with their lost "land" and "nation."

So for the sake of honesty, let's not use the word "Palestinian" any more to describe these delightful folks, who dance for joy at our deaths until someone points out they're being taped. Instead, let's call them what they are: "Other Arabs Who Can't Accomplish Anything In Life And Would Rather Wrap Themselves In The Seductive Melodrama Of Eternal Struggle And Death."

I know that's a bit unwieldy to expect to see on CNN. How about this, then: "Adjacent Jew-Haters." Okay, so the Adjacent Jew-Haters want their own country. Oops, just one more thing. No, they don't. They could've had their own country any time in the last thirty years, especially two years ago at Camp David. But if you have your own country, you have to have traffic lights and garbage trucks and Chambers of Commerce, and, worse, you actually have to figure out some way to make a living.

That's no fun. No, they want what all the other Jew-Haters in the region
want: Israel. They also want a big pile of dead Jews, of course --that's where the real fun is -- but mostly they want Israel.

Why? For one thing, trying to destroy Israel - or "The Zionist Entity"
as their textbooks call it -- for the last fifty years has allowed the rulers of Arab countries to divert the attention of their own people away from the fact that they're the blue-ribbon most illiterate, poorest, and tribally backward on God's Earth, and if you've ever been around God's Earth, you know that's really saying something.

It makes me roll my eyes every time one of our pundits waxes poetic about the great history and culture of the Muslim Mid east. Unless I'm missing something, the Arabs haven't given anything to the world since Algebra, and, by the way, thanks a hell of a lot for that one.

Chew this around and spit it out: Five hundred million Arabs; five Million Jews. Think of all the Arab countries as a football field, and Israel as a pack of matches sitting in the middle of it. And now these same folks swear that if Israel gives them half of that pack of matches,Everyone will be pals..

Really? Wow, what neat news. Hey, but what about the string of wars to obliterate the tiny country and the constant din of rabid blood oaths to drive every Jew into the sea? Oh, that? We were just kidding.

My friend Kevin Rooney made a gorgeous point the other day: Just reverse the Numbers. Imagine five hundred million Jews and five million Arabs. I was stunned at the simple brilliance of it. Can anyone picture the Jews strapping belts of razor blades and dynamite to themselves? Of course not.

Or marshaling every fiber and force at their disposal for generations to drive a tiny Arab State into the sea?Nonsense. Or dancing for joy at the murder of innocents? Impossible. Or spreading and believing horrible lies about the Arabs baking their bread with the blood of children?

Disgusting.

No, as you know, left to themselves in a world of peace, the worst Jews would ever do to people is debate them to death.

I understand that with vital operations in Iraq, it's in our interest, as Americans, to try to stabilize our Arab allies as much as possible, and, after all, that can't be much harder than stabilizing a roomful of super models who've just had their drugs taken away.

However, in any big-picture strategy, there's always a danger of losing moral weight. We've already lost some. After September 11th our president told us and the world he was going to root out all terrorists and the countries that supported them. Beautiful. Then the Israelis, after months and months of having the equivalent of an Oklahoma City every week (and then every day) start to do the same thing we did, and we tell them to show restraint.

If America were being attacked with an Oklahoma City every day, we would all very shortly be screaming for the administration to just be done with it and kill everything south of the Mediterranean and east of the Jordan.

Please feel free to pass this along to your friends Walk in peace! Be Happy!

Have a wonderful life!
 
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ajwps said:
For those who don't know, Dennis Miller is a comedian who has a show called Dennis Miller Live on HBO. He is not Jewish. He recently said the following about the Mideast situation:

"A brief overview of the situation is always valuable, so as a service to all Americans who still don't get it, I now offer you the story of the Middle East in just a few paragraphs, which is all you Really need.

Here we go:

The Palestinians want their own country. There's just one thing about that: There are no Palestinians. It's a made up word. Israel was called Palestine for two thousand years. Like "Wiccan," "Palestinian" sounds ancient but is really a modern invention. Before the Israelis won the land in the 1967 war, Gaza was owned by Egypt, the West Bank was owned by Jordan, and there were no "Palestinians."

As soon as the Jews took over and started growing oranges as big as basketballs, what do you know, say hello to the "Palestinians," weeping for their deep bond with their lost "land" and "nation."

So for the sake of honesty, let's not use the word "Palestinian" any more to describe these delightful folks, who dance for joy at our deaths until someone points out they're being taped. Instead, let's call them what they are: "Other Arabs Who Can't Accomplish Anything In Life And Would Rather Wrap Themselves In The Seductive Melodrama Of Eternal Struggle And Death."

I know that's a bit unwieldy to expect to see on CNN. How about this, then: "Adjacent Jew-Haters." Okay, so the Adjacent Jew-Haters want their own country. Oops, just one more thing. No, they don't. They could've had their own country any time in the last thirty years, especially two years ago at Camp David. But if you have your own country, you have to have traffic lights and garbage trucks and Chambers of Commerce, and, worse, you actually have to figure out some way to make a living.

That's no fun. No, they want what all the other Jew-Haters in the region
want: Israel. They also want a big pile of dead Jews, of course --that's where the real fun is -- but mostly they want Israel.

Why? For one thing, trying to destroy Israel - or "The Zionist Entity"
as their textbooks call it -- for the last fifty years has allowed the rulers of Arab countries to divert the attention of their own people away from the fact that they're the blue-ribbon most illiterate, poorest, and tribally backward on God's Earth, and if you've ever been around God's Earth, you know that's really saying something.

It makes me roll my eyes every time one of our pundits waxes poetic about the great history and culture of the Muslim Mid east. Unless I'm missing something, the Arabs haven't given anything to the world since Algebra, and, by the way, thanks a hell of a lot for that one.

Chew this around and spit it out: Five hundred million Arabs; five Million Jews. Think of all the Arab countries as a football field, and Israel as a pack of matches sitting in the middle of it. And now these same folks swear that if Israel gives them half of that pack of matches,Everyone will be pals..

Really? Wow, what neat news. Hey, but what about the string of wars to obliterate the tiny country and the constant din of rabid blood oaths to drive every Jew into the sea? Oh, that? We were just kidding.

My friend Kevin Rooney made a gorgeous point the other day: Just reverse the Numbers. Imagine five hundred million Jews and five million Arabs. I was stunned at the simple brilliance of it. Can anyone picture the Jews strapping belts of razor blades and dynamite to themselves? Of course not.

Or marshaling every fiber and force at their disposal for generations to drive a tiny Arab State into the sea?Nonsense. Or dancing for joy at the murder of innocents? Impossible. Or spreading and believing horrible lies about the Arabs baking their bread with the blood of children?

Disgusting.

No, as you know, left to themselves in a world of peace, the worst Jews would ever do to people is debate them to death.

I understand that with vital operations in Iraq, it's in our interest, as Americans, to try to stabilize our Arab allies as much as possible, and, after all, that can't be much harder than stabilizing a roomful of super models who've just had their drugs taken away.

However, in any big-picture strategy, there's always a danger of losing moral weight. We've already lost some. After September 11th our president told us and the world he was going to root out all terrorists and the countries that supported them. Beautiful. Then the Israelis, after months and months of having the equivalent of an Oklahoma City every week (and then every day) start to do the same thing we did, and we tell them to show restraint.

If America were being attacked with an Oklahoma City every day, we would all very shortly be screaming for the administration to just be done with it and kill everything south of the Mediterranean and east of the Jordan.

Please feel free to pass this along to your friends Walk in peace! Be Happy!

Have a wonderful life!


So is the point that the "Palestinians" are just like the rest of the arabs and they should mind their own business and America should support everything Israel does?
 
dilloduck said:
So is the point that the "Palestinians" are just like the rest of the arabs and they should mind their own business and America should support everything Israel does?

What do you mean by your statement that because the Palestinians are just Arabs somehow America has anything to do with or not with supporting the Arabs desire to kill the Jewish people?

Why are you always trying to personalize your vision of reality with what the US should or should not do about or to any country or anything?

America or the Bush Administration does not support anybody or any country unless America has vital interests in the ultimate outcome of events which effects us.

How did you like the comparison of 500 million Jews vs 5 million Arabs? And instead of Jewish oranges, it was Israel who was sitting on all the oil.

Would you still think the US should help or ignore the Jewish people.
 
ajwps said:
What do you mean by your statement that because the Palestinians are just Arabs somehow America has anything to do with or not with supporting the Arabs desire to kill the Jewish people?

Why are you always trying to personalize your vision of reality with what the US should or should not do about or to any country or anything?

America or the Bush Administration does not support anybody or any country unless America has vital interests in the ultimate outcome of events which effects us.

How did you like the comparison of 500 million Jews vs 5 million Arabs? And instead of Jewish oranges, it was Israel who was sitting on all the oil.

Would you still think the US should help or ignore the Jewish people.

I understand that you hate anyone who supports the palestinian cause because they all want to kill jews. You point has been made over and over and over. American taxpayers have made sure that Israel maintains its' overwhelming military superiority in the mid-east. Israel doesn't need permission from anyone to protect itself. What's important for Israel is that the real power brokers in the world see it's need to exist. You need to talk to them. Average Americans have no idea what's happening in Israel.
 
dilloduck said:
I understand that you hate anyone who supports the palestinian cause because they all want to kill jews. You point has been made over and over and over. American taxpayers have made sure that Israel maintains its' overwhelming military superiority in the mid-east. Israel doesn't need permission from anyone to protect itself. What's important for Israel is that the real power brokers in the world see it's need to exist. You need to talk to them. Average Americans have no idea what's happening in Israel.

What makes you think that the real Nations of the world don't see Israel as an obstacle to peace or that Israel and the Jewish people have no right to life?

Those power brokers know all to well that Israel has as much right to exist as any nation of the world. But it is not in the interest of these real country brokers to allow the Jewish people to continue living on this planet.

THEY KNOW ALL TOO WELL.....

THAT HAS ALWAYS BEEN THE PROBLEM....
 
ajwps said:
What makes you think that the real Nations of the world don't see Israel as an obstacle to peace or that Israel and the Jewish people have no right to life?

Those power brokers know all to well that Israel has as much right to exist as any nation of the world. But it is not in the interest of these real country brokers to allow the Jewish people to continue living on this planet.

THEY KNOW ALL TOO WELL.....

THAT HAS ALWAYS BEEN THE PROBLEM....

So what do you recommend as a solution? Is America trying to drown the jews in money?
 
why would i care about what some comedian with no foreign affairs, diplomatic or humanitarian experience has to say about the crisis in the middle east?

next thing you know, you'll be telling pres. bush should take and heed advice from george clooney and alan alda
 
dilloduck said:
So what do you recommend as a solution? Is America trying to drown the jews in money?

Not at all. John Kerry has stated on his website, that if elected he will make friends with all our traditional allies, France, Germany, Russia and the Arab countries by rethinking (deserting) USA's common partnertship with Israel.

This is not the first time in more than 3 thousand years this alignment has been tried and it won't be the last. But if Kerry is elected, as bad as Bush is, the USA will get what it wants and deserves, a partnership with those nations going down the primrose path.
 
AJ,
Not to get off topic What was Henery Fords beef with jewish people?
He wrote some papers against jews.
 
White knight said:
AJ,
Not to get off topic What was Henery Fords beef with jewish people?
He wrote some papers against jews.

"Strangely, Ford came to believe in a Jewish world conspiracy. He blamed Jewish financiers for fomenting World War I so that they could profit from supplying both sides. He suspected Jewish automobile dealers of conspiring to undermine Ford Company sales policies. Ford vented his beliefs about Jewish power public in the pages of the Dearborn Independent. For a year, the editor resisted running Ford’s anti-Jewish articles and finally resigned rather than publish them. Cameron, Ford’s personal columnist, took over the editorship and, in May 1920, published the first of a series of articles titled "The International Jew: The World’s Problem."

For the next 18 months, Cameron ran the "International Jew" as a series and later collected the articles and published them as a book. Liebold hired former military intelligence investigators to assist Cameron in gathering so-called "evidence" that "proved" Jewish control of world finance, Jewish organization of radical political movements and Jewish manipulation of diplomacy to cause wars in which Christians died to enrich Jews. The investigators unearthed evidence that president Woodrow Wilson took secret orders over the phone from Justice Brandeis and that a Jewish member of the Federal Reserve Board personally thwarted Ford’s plan to purchase nitrate mines from the Federal government."


A few months after the series began, Ford’s operatives introduced him to a Russian émigré, Paquita de Shishmareff. She showed Ford a copy of the Protocols of the Elders of Zion, a document forged by the Russian czar’s secret service at the turn of the century that purportedly recorded a series of lectures by European Jewish leaders that outlined a conspiracy by Jewish communists and bankers to overthrow European governments. Ford passed a copy of the Protocols to Cameron and the Independent turned its attention to bringing this "blueprint" for world destruction to the public.

As historian Ribuffo puts it, "Whether or not an Elder of Zion actually gave these lectures" described in the Protocols, "it was clear [to Ford] that Jews used these ideas to ‘corrupt Public Opinion,’ [that Jews] controlled finance, sponsored revolution, and were ‘everywhere’ exercising power." The Independent charged that the Jewish-inspired national debt was enslaving Americans and that German Jewish financier Paul Warburg had emigrated to America "for the express purpose of changing our financial system" by creating the Federal Reserve. As an "international nation" of people who cooperated with each other, Jews had an unfair advantage in business over Christians, who relied on individualism to get ahead. The paper even described American Jewish aid for European Jewish victims of pogroms as part of the conspiracy.

For seven years, the Independent continued to publish anti-Semitic articles until the target of one series, California farm cooperative organizer Aaron Sapiro, sued Ford for libel. Sapiro was the third Jew to sue Ford and the first to get to trial. Ford refused to testify and apparently staged an automobile accident so he could hide in a hospital. The judge finally declared a mistrial but Ford decided to settle with Sapiro out of court. During the trial, Jewish leaders had called for a boycott of Ford motorcars and slumping sales might have played a role in Ford’s decision to put the case behind him.

Leaders of the American Jewish Committee and B’nai Brith Anti-Defamation League negotiated an agreement whereby Ford publicly announced that "articles reflecting on the Jews" would never again appear in the Independent. Ford claimed that he was "mortified" to learn the Protocols were forged, described himself as "fully aware of the virtues of the Jewish people" and offered them his "future friendship and good will." He claimed to have been too busy to read the pieces and implicitly blamed Liebold and Cameron for printing them. Louis Marshall, chair of the American Jewish Committee, described Ford’s statement as "humiliating."

Ford closed the Independent in December 1927. He later claimed that his signature on the agreement with Marshall was forged, and that Jewish bankers had caused World War II. Ford died in 1947, apparently unrepentant.
 
ajwps said:
For those who don't know, Dennis Miller is a comedian who has a show called Dennis Miller Live on HBO. He is not Jewish. He recently said the following about the Mideast situation:

"A brief overview of the situation is always valuable, so as a service to all Americans who still don't get it, I now offer you the story of the Middle East in just a few paragraphs, which is all you Really need.

Here we go:

The Palestinians want their own country. There's just one thing about that: There are no Palestinians. It's a made up word. Israel was called Palestine for two thousand years. Like "Wiccan," "Palestinian" sounds ancient but is really a modern invention. Before the Israelis won the land in the 1967 war, Gaza was owned by Egypt, the West Bank was owned by Jordan, and there were no "Palestinians."

As soon as the Jews took over and started growing oranges as big as basketballs, what do you know, say hello to the "Palestinians," weeping for their deep bond with their lost "land" and "nation."

So for the sake of honesty, let's not use the word "Palestinian" any more to describe these delightful folks, who dance for joy at our deaths until someone points out they're being taped. Instead, let's call them what they are: "Other Arabs Who Can't Accomplish Anything In Life And Would Rather Wrap Themselves In The Seductive Melodrama Of Eternal Struggle And Death."

I know that's a bit unwieldy to expect to see on CNN. How about this, then: "Adjacent Jew-Haters." Okay, so the Adjacent Jew-Haters want their own country. Oops, just one more thing. No, they don't. They could've had their own country any time in the last thirty years, especially two years ago at Camp David. But if you have your own country, you have to have traffic lights and garbage trucks and Chambers of Commerce, and, worse, you actually have to figure out some way to make a living.

That's no fun. No, they want what all the other Jew-Haters in the region
want: Israel. They also want a big pile of dead Jews, of course --that's where the real fun is -- but mostly they want Israel.

Why? For one thing, trying to destroy Israel - or "The Zionist Entity"
as their textbooks call it -- for the last fifty years has allowed the rulers of Arab countries to divert the attention of their own people away from the fact that they're the blue-ribbon most illiterate, poorest, and tribally backward on God's Earth, and if you've ever been around God's Earth, you know that's really saying something.

It makes me roll my eyes every time one of our pundits waxes poetic about the great history and culture of the Muslim Mid east. Unless I'm missing something, the Arabs haven't given anything to the world since Algebra, and, by the way, thanks a hell of a lot for that one.

Chew this around and spit it out: Five hundred million Arabs; five Million Jews. Think of all the Arab countries as a football field, and Israel as a pack of matches sitting in the middle of it. And now these same folks swear that if Israel gives them half of that pack of matches,Everyone will be pals..

Really? Wow, what neat news. Hey, but what about the string of wars to obliterate the tiny country and the constant din of rabid blood oaths to drive every Jew into the sea? Oh, that? We were just kidding.

My friend Kevin Rooney made a gorgeous point the other day: Just reverse the Numbers. Imagine five hundred million Jews and five million Arabs. I was stunned at the simple brilliance of it. Can anyone picture the Jews strapping belts of razor blades and dynamite to themselves? Of course not.

Or marshaling every fiber and force at their disposal for generations to drive a tiny Arab State into the sea?Nonsense. Or dancing for joy at the murder of innocents? Impossible. Or spreading and believing horrible lies about the Arabs baking their bread with the blood of children?

Disgusting.

No, as you know, left to themselves in a world of peace, the worst Jews would ever do to people is debate them to death.

I understand that with vital operations in Iraq, it's in our interest, as Americans, to try to stabilize our Arab allies as much as possible, and, after all, that can't be much harder than stabilizing a roomful of super models who've just had their drugs taken away.

However, in any big-picture strategy, there's always a danger of losing moral weight. We've already lost some. After September 11th our president told us and the world he was going to root out all terrorists and the countries that supported them. Beautiful. Then the Israelis, after months and months of having the equivalent of an Oklahoma City every week (and then every day) start to do the same thing we did, and we tell them to show restraint.

If America were being attacked with an Oklahoma City every day, we would all very shortly be screaming for the administration to just be done with it and kill everything south of the Mediterranean and east of the Jordan.

Please feel free to pass this along to your friends Walk in peace! Be Happy!

Have a wonderful life!


applausev.gif
 
Let's take a quick tally:

you have bad-mouthed practically every American president.

you consistently call Americans racists.

you label anyone who disagrees with you an anti-semite.

you assert that America is never doing enough despite the billions we pour into Israel.

you view the arabs as sub-human despite the fact that Jews and Arabs are descended from a common lineage. Matter of fact, Jews ARE Arabs by descent. Just not all Arabs are Jews. Some are muslims.

Have you ever considered the possibility that you need to get some counselling for that persecution complex of your's?
 
Merlin1047 said:
Let's take a quick tally:

you have bad-mouthed practically every American president.

you consistently call Americans racists.

you label anyone who disagrees with you an anti-semite.

you assert that America is never doing enough despite the billions we pour into Israel.

you view the arabs as sub-human despite the fact that Jews and Arabs are descended from a common lineage. Matter of fact, Jews ARE Arabs by descent. Just not all Arabs are Jews. Some are muslims.

Have you ever considered the possibility that you need to get some counselling for that persecution complex of your's?

TALLY ANSWER: YOUR AN ARABIST AND HATE THE DEMOCRATIC ISRAEL.
 
Hey Merlin, I don't think that you are anti-semitic. I think that you are 100% entitled to your opinions and if you support them enough logically, you may even change my mind on some issues. Now for a discussion on my dear brother ...
I am a Jew and yes I have a brother. Yes I am a Semite as are Arabs. Yes, even our languages have common roots. I have no issues with Arabs. In fact, I think Arabs are wonderful people ... until you add a dash of Islam. It's not that I try not to get along with Moslems, just look at how well Judeo-Christian relations have developed. The issue is that Mohamed had an especially hard time with me. You don't see Mohamed ranting that Christian are decendents of Mokeys and pigs but he says just that about me. I'm an evolutionist, so I'll agree with half of that. Guess what a majority of my brothers have decided to go and do ?! .. convert to Islam and implement Islamic dictatorships. AWSOME !! (I hope you can smell the sarcasm). So despite the fact that he is my brother, sadly he meens me harm. I am really between a rock and a hard place. I know you understand, and I know that it doesn't excuse all actions. I think that in the larger picture, Israel has shown a lot of restraint between the intifada and the scuds from Iraq. And just to get one thing straight, Israel did not intervene in Iraq because we do recognize that the US has been a great alli and we do appreciate the support. Just don't want you thinking that Israel takes US foreign aid for granted.
 

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