Coming clean

jimnyc

...
Aug 28, 2003
19,743
271
83
New York
I know I told you all I received an offer to work with that equity firm in Greenwich, CT. I've been less than forthcoming and embarrassed since my first day there.

I showed up and they immediately called me in for a meeting. They had received my background check late the Friday before and decided to rescind their offer. They were polite about it, and understanding, but since they are involved in nothing but secure transactions and high profile companies, it's a matter of policy.

So since I was stupid enough to share my job offering with parents & friends, I've been lying low ever since.

Young and stupid, it follows you for a long time nonetheless. No, I didn't murder anyone, no porno or sex charges, embezzlement or anything that involved a 'victim'. I was nailed for doing the opposite of Slick Willy since I actually inhaled, and had some in my posession as well. I should have contacted him for a pardon while he was in office! :)

So rather than sulk I decided to be pro-active and started building up my web presence in anticipation of giving it a go as a full time freelancer. I own around 80 domains now and have about 15 active websites. I hope to get all 15 properly running, SEO'd and linked, and then work on networking everything and getting additional sites up.

This site was always just a fun hobby for me that I tried to monetize a bit to help pay the bills but will always remain a site for good debate and chat. I've learned a lot about SEO, traffic, linking... A few of my other sites are getting great traffic but low CTR (click through rate) so the money really isn't there.

Ok, rambling again, must be the hydrocodone mixed with the steroids (methylprednisolone) & the xanax & the Paxil & the trileptal. All legal I'm proud to say! :laugh:
 
jimnyc said:
I know I told you all I received an offer to work with that equity firm in Greenwich, CT. I've been less than forthcoming and embarrassed since my first day there.

I showed up and they immediately called me in for a meeting. They had received my background check late the Friday before and decided to rescind their offer. They were polite about it, and understanding, but since they are involved in nothing but secure transactions and high profile companies, it's a matter of policy.

So since I was stupid enough to share my job offering with parents & friends, I've been lying low ever since.

Young and stupid, it follows you for a long time nonetheless. No, I didn't murder anyone, no porno or sex charges, embezzlement or anything that involved a 'victim'. I was nailed for doing the opposite of Slick Willy since I actually inhaled, and had some in my posession as well. I should have contacted him for a pardon while he was in office! :)

So rather than sulk I decided to be pro-active and started building up my web presence in anticipation of giving it a go as a full time freelancer. I own around 80 domains now and have about 15 active websites. I hope to get all 15 properly running, SEO'd and linked, and then work on networking everything and getting additional sites up.

This site was always just a fun hobby for me that I tried to monetize a bit to help pay the bills but will always remain a site for good debate and chat. I've learned a lot about SEO, traffic, linking... A few of my other sites are getting great traffic but low CTR (click through rate) so the money really isn't there.

Ok, rambling again, must be the hydrocodone mixed with the steroids (methylprednisolone) & the xanax & the Paxil & the trileptal. All legal I'm proud to say! :laugh:
Well, I hope things do work out for you.
 
Oh, and BTW, the infraction wasn't recent, that was about 15 years ago! Before marriage, a son, career, maturity...
 
Don't say another word about it. Everything works out for the best.

As for the inhaling and "small amount for strictly personal use" - well, people make mistakes when they are young..and yes, sometimes they do follow.

Other people can read what happened to you and use it for inspiration perhaps the next time they decide that they can do something and possibly get away with it.

Head up and push forward! No one will judge you or change their feelings about you because of this.

You are tackling web-based opportunities and I have no doubt that it will work out better than you can imagine.
 
roomy said:
Don't offences such as yours ever become spent if you don't commit further crime after a period of time?

Legally..yes. In the security world? no. Unfortunately, such acts make you a security risk in some circles.
 
Hey Jimmy, if you can sell development hours as another service, I will do some work for ya. Database driven websites are my thing, well were, when I used to work. I'm also looking at this new RUBY crap. Seems cool and the deployment environments are cheap, cheap, cheap.
 
when you wrote opposite of Slick Willy I thought YOU were a 'monica'...then thought "How could somebody get in trouble for THAT?? It's gross...but..."


:p:
 
jimnyc said:
Oh, and BTW, the infraction wasn't recent, that was about 15 years ago! Before marriage, a son, career, maturity...

Were you forthcoming about it before they started the background investigation? I don't think we would have let it stop us from hiring you if you were.
 
jimnyc said:
....I've been less than forthcoming and embarrassed since my first day there.....Young and stupid, it follows you for a long time nonetheless....
So rather than sulk I decided to be pro-active and started building up my web presence in anticipation of giving it a go as a full time freelancer.
It takes a man with a big set to come front & center like this. It can be a very hard thing to do. But I admire a man that chooses to do this. Admit he's screwed up, learn from it and get back in there and fight. I've seen a change for the good in you over the 3+ years I've been here. You'll do just fine J. :rock:
 
That's total BS. I guarantee there are a lot more people at that firm that drink on a regular basis than do what you did FIFTEEN YEARS AGO. But, of course, marijuana's way more dangerous than alcohol because it's..... illegal? This truly pisses me off, Jim, I'm sorry this happened to you. Oh well, you'll find something else.
 
jimnyc said:
Oh, and BTW, the infraction wasn't recent, that was about 15 years ago! Before marriage, a son, career, maturity...

Not sure why you felt obligated to tell us your private business, but that took guts :salute:

Anyway if I understand it correctly you are doing something you really enjoy and still making money at it?
That is great! I wish you much success Jim!
 
Jim -

In my eyes, what happened to you made a complete change in your life - all for the better! And I would like to personally file a complaint against that police department for telling me that if you cooperated with them as you did, no charges would be filed! That being said, I am more than proud of the MAN you have become!!

Love Ya!
 
Jim-

Hell man, if everybody came clean the way you have, the number of people that have or still do smoke a little weed would boggle the mind. I've smoked a shit load of pot myself. I was just lucky enough not to get caught. And that would make me a better man for that job than you. I freakin' doubt it.

I haven't smoked any in quite a few years now though. The buzz seemed to change and I just didn't enjoy it anymore. Beer and prescrip meds for me now. I too have fun things like Hydrocodone/Acetaminophen-(Vicodin), Acetominophen & Codeine-(Tylenol III), which gives me a better buzz than the Vicodin, Cyclobenzaprine, etc., all legal.

But, I hope all your endeavors are successful pard. Lord knows your USMB is... :thup:
 
I'm sorry, Jim. I think it's a shame things worked out like they did. I'm wondering, though, is it possible for you to have your record expunged so that it becomes something that you don't have to disclose in the future?

Perhaps things worked out like they were supposed to, though, and you're meant to pursue these new opportunities. I hope your new endeavors (or the older ones that you're going to throw yourself into) bring you much success.

-- J
 
jillian said:
I'm sorry, Jim. I think it's a shame things worked out like they did. I'm wondering, though, is it possible for you to have your record expunged so that it becomes something that you don't have to disclose in the future?

Perhaps things worked out like they were supposed to, though, and you're meant to pursue these new opportunities. I hope your new endeavors (or the older ones that you're going to throw yourself into) bring you much success.

-- J

Yes, it's possible to have the record expunged. It's not cheap to do so and an attorney would likely need to be involved. I'm exploring those options...

Thank you for the well wishes, it's much appreciated!

-Jim
 
Jim,

That amazes me how simple minded the working world has become. It has been 34 years since I began smoking and I recently quit to be able to pass one of those ridiculous drug tests. You can be an alcoholic or a coke head and pass those tests easily but if you have smoked in the last month....aha, you're a pothead!

I have never been one to get addicted to anything, I can take or leave the few hits a day, I just enjoy the relaxed feeling. Now I am going to have to seek the same by drinking alcohol(legal), not a good substitute, never been able to do much creative work while drinking, I rarely do it.

I remember thinking 30 years ago how silly it was to allow alcohol consumption with the hundreds of thousands of deaths attributed to it each year and yet demonize a weed that grows naturally, causes no deaths, and doesn't take major industrial processing to use like cigarettes(hundreds of thousands more deaths).

I had a friend whose life was literally destroyed when he was arrested for possessing a thimble full, he was riding in a car that was stopped. He lost his job that he woke up at 4 a.m. each morning to go to for 15 years. That caused him to lose his house after he couldn't find new work that could pay his bills. That successfully broke up his marriage and caused a continued slide downhill to his death from a stroke and heart attack. He was diabetic and overweight and became worse with the depressed state he found himself in. The cop that stopped the guy that was driving spent 2 hours searching the car and filing all the paperwork, meanwhile, drunks, rapist, murderers flew by on the intrastate near by......I actually saw the guy(State Cop) speeding through my neighborhood(he lived a few houses down) and confronted him a few months after my friend died. He had no regret about driving 2.5 times the speed limit on our 2 lane road or neglecting to stop at the 4 stop signs I witnessed when I was behind him that day. I went on to congratulate him on his huge bust that took a citizen off the tax rolls and eventually led to his complete destruction, again no remorse. I told him he was an asshole and should arrest himself for the repeated offenses I witness by him daily and he just laughed it off and told me I better watch how I drive(amazing how that job attracts guys with tiny reproductive organs, just guessing of course by the way he conducts himself).

What is truely amazing is that my friend worked at a country club managing the carts and driving range. This same C.C. has young girls driving around the golf course selling liquor to anyone that wants to buy it and nothing is said when the members, in a drunken stupor, get in their cars to drive home.......this place pushes alcohol all day and fired my friend after 15 years for a thimble full of pot that he was arrested for off duty....what a great world we live in.

Didn't our last 2 Presidents admit to smoking it? Isn't it time to quit the bullshit crusade and purposeful distortion of the effects of that simple weed? I am amazed at the lies told by law enforcement about it and the supposedly increased potentcy, what a crock. I know the truth, I have smoked it for 34 years, worked steadily, payed all of my taxes, haven't cheated or stole anything, haven't had a ticket, created some extremely complex works of art, handled complicated camera equipment, lazer measuring devices, used computers for illustration and photo retouching, traveled the world doing my job, and stayed healthy. In college I experimented with other drugs because my friends were and didn't like the effects so I never did them again, I would say beer was the true gateway drug. I have quit without incident many times to see if I would enjoy life more....never an addiction, never a need to start again. I can't remember the last time I got drunk, don't enjoy that feeling of total lack of control.

Sir Paul McCartney's drug of choice is pot and he has accomplished just a few things in life.

The truth is that the alcohol industry has been working against the legalization of pot since they sponsored that farce "Reefer Madness", one of the worst movies ever produced. Millions use pot everyday, I would feel much safer with someone driving next to me stoned rather than drunk anyday. People are shot, stabbed or beat up because of the aggressive effects of alcohol each day, I would guess none of that happens with people who have smoked exclusively.

The shame isn't in what you did Jim, it is that law enforcement wastes time each day busting people for something so trivial I would be ashamed to admit it if I was a cop. Good luck with your endeavores and I'll PM you soon on that other idea. :thup:
 

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