Chat up lines

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Bootneck, Aug 1, 2009.

  1. Bootneck
    Offline

    Bootneck Diamond Member

    Joined:
    Aug 6, 2008
    Messages:
    3,576
    Thanks Received:
    2,972
    Trophy Points:
    2,050
    Location:
    England
    Ratings:
    +4,172
    OK so what are some of your best...or worse...chat up lines?

    I'll start off. This is an example of the double reverse:

    Getting into a hotel elevator my elbow nudged the breast of a rather attractive young lady.
    By way of apology I said, "If your heart is as soft as your breast, I know you will forgive me."

    Her response; "If your dick is as hard as your elbow I'm in room 4115."

    :eusa_eh:
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 1
  2. strollingbones
    Offline

    strollingbones Diamond Member

    Joined:
    Aug 18, 2008
    Messages:
    65,657
    Thanks Received:
    15,627
    Trophy Points:
    2,190
    Location:
    chicken farm
    Ratings:
    +31,973
    why is it all men know exactly what they had hit when they elbow you in the chest?
     
  3. Bootneck
    Offline

    Bootneck Diamond Member

    Joined:
    Aug 6, 2008
    Messages:
    3,576
    Thanks Received:
    2,972
    Trophy Points:
    2,050
    Location:
    England
    Ratings:
    +4,172
    Well, apart from the fact that most men have had a relationship with the breasts from birth, it's because we know that women thrust them towards our elbows on purpose.
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 1
  4. strollingbones
    Offline

    strollingbones Diamond Member

    Joined:
    Aug 18, 2008
    Messages:
    65,657
    Thanks Received:
    15,627
    Trophy Points:
    2,190
    Location:
    chicken farm
    Ratings:
    +31,973
    no no we dont....them elbows can really hurt.....i hate being in a sea of men...my hubby says when he hears the 3rd or 4th....excuse me ma'am.. he knows it is too crowded...i quit going to the large shows due to this and panic attacks. ..and why do you hold your hands out.. you know that classic hands in the air...palms out....thing men do....do you think i am gonna let you touch them..cause you are polite?
     
  5. Bootneck
    Offline

    Bootneck Diamond Member

    Joined:
    Aug 6, 2008
    Messages:
    3,576
    Thanks Received:
    2,972
    Trophy Points:
    2,050
    Location:
    England
    Ratings:
    +4,172
    Who's talking crowded. There was only two in the elevator. :cool:

    Mind you, when we're wearing dress blues, women tend to throw their panties at you...let alone their boobs.
     
  6. DamnYankee
    Offline

    DamnYankee No Neg Policy

    Joined:
    Apr 2, 2009
    Messages:
    4,516
    Thanks Received:
    441
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Ratings:
    +441
    Guessin' no time is wasted on "chat up" lines there... <chuckle>

    He says, "I'm not a gynecologist, but I'll take a look."

    I say, "Well, honesty is the best policy. Be by guest."
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 1
  7. KittenKoder
    Offline

    KittenKoder Senior Member

    Joined:
    Sep 21, 2008
    Messages:
    23,281
    Thanks Received:
    1,711
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Location:
    Nowhere
    Ratings:
    +1,714
    Strolling, remember who you are responding to, Bootneck is the master of smartassery that all us lesser smartasses aspire to.
     
  8. editec
    Offline

    editec Mr. Forgot-it-All

    Joined:
    Jun 5, 2008
    Messages:
    41,427
    Thanks Received:
    5,598
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Location:
    Maine
    Ratings:
    +5,618
    Lines are worthless.

    If the person is likely to be receptive almost anything you say that isn't completely insane will work.

    If the person isn't interested?

    Nothing will.
     
  9. Bootneck
    Offline

    Bootneck Diamond Member

    Joined:
    Aug 6, 2008
    Messages:
    3,576
    Thanks Received:
    2,972
    Trophy Points:
    2,050
    Location:
    England
    Ratings:
    +4,172
    Someone has to make the approach with an opening line, even if it's only, 'Would you like to sit on my lap and talk about the first thing that comes up?'
     
  10. chanel
    Offline

    chanel Silver Member

    Joined:
    Jun 8, 2009
    Messages:
    12,130
    Thanks Received:
    2,746
    Trophy Points:
    98
    Location:
    People's Republic of NJ
    Ratings:
    +2,749
    Yesterday some kid asked me to be his "cougar" for the night. I told him to get a note from his mom. Then I growled. He and his friends nearly pee'd themselves laughing.
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 1

Share This Page