Call to outlaw sporks

Discussion in 'Political Satire' started by Ernie S., Apr 24, 2013.

  1. Ernie S.
    Offline

    Ernie S. Diamond Member

    Joined:
    Nov 14, 2010
    Messages:
    34,379
    Thanks Received:
    8,048
    Trophy Points:
    1,340
    Location:
    Sweet Home Alabama
    Ratings:
    +13,836
    With the recent rash of obesity in the United States, Democrats have decided that the time is ripe to capitalize on yet another catastrophe.
    Getting fat is just too convenient.
    We must outlaw sporks because with such instruments of mass consumption, children can become fat much faster.
    Think about it! Without the need to switch utensils between soup and salad, our precious "chilrun" can consume more transfats and high fructose corn syrup than they would be capable of, were they forced to switch between their spoon and their fork.

    Contact your Senators and Congressmen and demand a ban on sporks
    Find your Representative

    Find your Senator

    [​IMG]
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 2
    Last edited: Apr 24, 2013
  2. cereal_killer
    Offline

    cereal_killer Administrator Staff Member

    Joined:
    Apr 9, 2012
    Messages:
    6,859
    Thanks Received:
    3,030
    Trophy Points:
    420
    Location:
    Austin
    Ratings:
    +7,475
    Moved to proper forum....
     
  3. rightwinger
    Offline

    rightwinger Award Winning USMB Paid Messageboard Poster

    Joined:
    Aug 4, 2009
    Messages:
    146,203
    Thanks Received:
    23,126
    Trophy Points:
    2,190
    Ratings:
    +64,103
    Great idea!

    Ban knives and forks too

    If Americans had to eat with chopsticks they wouldn't be so fucking fat

    [​IMG]
     
    Last edited: Apr 24, 2013
  4. Ernie S.
    Offline

    Ernie S. Diamond Member

    Joined:
    Nov 14, 2010
    Messages:
    34,379
    Thanks Received:
    8,048
    Trophy Points:
    1,340
    Location:
    Sweet Home Alabama
    Ratings:
    +13,836
    [​IMG]
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 1
  5. Ernie S.
    Offline

    Ernie S. Diamond Member

    Joined:
    Nov 14, 2010
    Messages:
    34,379
    Thanks Received:
    8,048
    Trophy Points:
    1,340
    Location:
    Sweet Home Alabama
    Ratings:
    +13,836
    OK RW, you could at least leave a comment...
     
  6. Dot Com
    Offline

    Dot Com Nullius in verba

    Joined:
    Feb 15, 2011
    Messages:
    52,842
    Thanks Received:
    7,759
    Trophy Points:
    1,830
    Location:
    Fairfax, NoVA
    Ratings:
    +18,115
    I used to live in Japan. Theres a diff between being large for a sport (sumo) and being simply obese because you happen to have no self control.
     
  7. Ernie S.
    Offline

    Ernie S. Diamond Member

    Joined:
    Nov 14, 2010
    Messages:
    34,379
    Thanks Received:
    8,048
    Trophy Points:
    1,340
    Location:
    Sweet Home Alabama
    Ratings:
    +13,836
    So no comments, Dottie?
     
  8. Mr. H.
    Offline

    Mr. H. Diamond Member

    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2009
    Messages:
    44,174
    Thanks Received:
    9,281
    Trophy Points:
    2,030
    Location:
    A warm place with no memory.
    Ratings:
    +15,506
    Unemployment is the convenience du jour.
    Spork or no spork.
    Obama is turning us into a nation of lazy fucks.
     
  9. April
    Offline

    April ♥Ancient Alien♥ Gold Supporting Member

    Joined:
    Oct 18, 2012
    Messages:
    24,959
    Thanks Received:
    15,239
    Trophy Points:
    1,445
    Ratings:
    +28,427
    [​IMG]
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 1
  10. TheOldSchool
    Offline

    TheOldSchool Diamond Member

    Joined:
    Sep 21, 2012
    Messages:
    56,561
    Thanks Received:
    9,321
    Trophy Points:
    2,070
    Location:
    last stop for sanity before reaching the south
    Ratings:
    +37,879
    Sporks are terrible. Shitty spoons and even worse forks.

    Ban them all.
     

Share This Page