Piss Bucket
Platinum Member
- Sep 16, 2014
- 282
- 78
- 415
I have proof of the existence of bigfoot. Back in 2006 I had an unsettling experience that changed my life. I was going through a rough patch. I thought that I may be having some depression issues because I was experiencing an irrational and uncanny feeling of dread every evening. It always happened at night... The strange occurrences. Things around the house would be moved around like someone was playing a joke on me. Even now it sends chills up my spine just recalling the events.
I finally came face to face with the beast that was haunting my nights. I had that feeling of dread coming over me as I was getting ready for bed. I never thought anything about bigfoots. I do not believe in supernatural stuff. Looking back, I do not recall any bigfoot sightings in my area. Bigfoot was the last thing on my mind.
So feeling that familiar uneasiness I went to bed that night. Nothing unusual; I just crawled into bed next to my wife and went to sleep. I tend to be something of a night owl. I usually hit the rack well after my wife was asleep.
Nothing happened during the night. It was the next morning. I was awakened by a disturbing grunting noise. I soon noticed a terrible smell. Then there was a hideous, bone chilling growl. I shot up out of bed and hit the floor. I immediately made a mental reference as to the location of my nearest gun.
Then I heard a low gutteral sound. In horror, I turned to the location of my bed. "Holy shit", I thought, it was coming from the bed. I slowly walked to the bed and pulled back the covers. There she was, right there in front of me: BIGFOOT!!!!
It was covered in hair. Apparently it was still sleeping. Was it snoring, or growling at me? And the smell... It was big, hairy, and in my bed. Then the horror sunk in: I AM MARRIED TO A FUCKING BIGFOOT!
I took off immediately. I had to figure out what to do. I had to get my head around this mystery. What the fuck happened to my wife? When I married her she was a beautiful redhead. She was sleek and sexy. But now...she is a beast.
I tried a couple times after that to enter my house to retrieve some belongings. But each time I tried I discovered that she was still there. The beast would not fucking leave. When she saw me she would growl and make frightening noises. It was just too much. I had to do something.
I sought professional help. I hired a lawyer. It was scary at first. But after a few legal maneuvers I got it out of my house and was able to move back into it. I do not know where it moved on to. I do have sightings of the beast from time to time. It still makes me shutter. Fortunately I have now moved on. I no longer have that irrational dread. The dark clouds have lifted and I no longer have to live in fear.
Let this be a lesson to you. Bigfoot is a fucking beast, and it is real. Apparently they have the ability to shape-shift and morph into a sexy little thing. But beware, for that hot little thing you fall in love with may not be who you think she is. She may be a fucking bigfoot that reveals itself after a few years of marriage. Be warned. I survived, but I was lucky.
I finally came face to face with the beast that was haunting my nights. I had that feeling of dread coming over me as I was getting ready for bed. I never thought anything about bigfoots. I do not believe in supernatural stuff. Looking back, I do not recall any bigfoot sightings in my area. Bigfoot was the last thing on my mind.
So feeling that familiar uneasiness I went to bed that night. Nothing unusual; I just crawled into bed next to my wife and went to sleep. I tend to be something of a night owl. I usually hit the rack well after my wife was asleep.
Nothing happened during the night. It was the next morning. I was awakened by a disturbing grunting noise. I soon noticed a terrible smell. Then there was a hideous, bone chilling growl. I shot up out of bed and hit the floor. I immediately made a mental reference as to the location of my nearest gun.
Then I heard a low gutteral sound. In horror, I turned to the location of my bed. "Holy shit", I thought, it was coming from the bed. I slowly walked to the bed and pulled back the covers. There she was, right there in front of me: BIGFOOT!!!!
It was covered in hair. Apparently it was still sleeping. Was it snoring, or growling at me? And the smell... It was big, hairy, and in my bed. Then the horror sunk in: I AM MARRIED TO A FUCKING BIGFOOT!
I took off immediately. I had to figure out what to do. I had to get my head around this mystery. What the fuck happened to my wife? When I married her she was a beautiful redhead. She was sleek and sexy. But now...she is a beast.
I tried a couple times after that to enter my house to retrieve some belongings. But each time I tried I discovered that she was still there. The beast would not fucking leave. When she saw me she would growl and make frightening noises. It was just too much. I had to do something.
I sought professional help. I hired a lawyer. It was scary at first. But after a few legal maneuvers I got it out of my house and was able to move back into it. I do not know where it moved on to. I do have sightings of the beast from time to time. It still makes me shutter. Fortunately I have now moved on. I no longer have that irrational dread. The dark clouds have lifted and I no longer have to live in fear.
Let this be a lesson to you. Bigfoot is a fucking beast, and it is real. Apparently they have the ability to shape-shift and morph into a sexy little thing. But beware, for that hot little thing you fall in love with may not be who you think she is. She may be a fucking bigfoot that reveals itself after a few years of marriage. Be warned. I survived, but I was lucky.
