Bend Over And Grease Up!

Discussion in 'Health and Lifestyle' started by George Costanza, Mar 31, 2010.

  1. George Costanza
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    George Costanza A Friendly Liberal

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    Well, it's that time again . . . time to clean 'em out, bend over and grease up. Yup. Colonoscopy time.

    You know, I didn't even know what a colonoscopy was until I was in my 50's. Probably a lot of you younger folks won't even know what I'm talking about here. You older ones will though, won't you . . . . hmmmmm?

    Let me put it to you this way: they shove a television camera up your ass. Here's a piece of advice from a guy who has seen not all, but a lot of it: if it ends in "oscopy," avoid it.

    I have had three of these bad boys previously and I am not looking forward to this one. During all three of the prior ones, I "woke up" in the middle of the procedure and experienced "discomfort," as the docs like to call it. Translation: it felt like someone was sticking a sword through my entire, lower body on all three occasions.

    The anesthetic involved was Versed. Versed is not an anesthetic in the pure sense. It does not knock you out - it just induces amnesia; you simply don't remember what happened. Docs like it because it is easier to administer, there is less risk and they can do it themselves - no anesthesiologist necessary. That's the good news. The bad news is that, with many patients, extreme pain can cause you to "come out of it" and, if that happens, you are in a world of hurt, because you are generally unable to communicate to the doctor that you have come out of it. You just have to lie there and take it.

    This time, I am insisting on doing it in the hospital with an anesthesiologist in attendance. Not going to come out of it a fourth time.

    OK - why this thread? I would like to hear from others who have gone through this procedure. How did it go for you? I will be amused to see how many folks pile on here to talk about how they went through a full colonoscopy with no anesthetic whatsoever. If you actually did that, more power to you. I suspect it didn't happen, but more power to you anyway.

    Anyone have any bad experiences with Versed in any context?
     
  2. waltky
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    waltky Wise ol' monkey Supporting Member

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    New non-invasive test has been developed that is as good as a colonoscopy...
    :eusa_clap:
    Non-Invasive Test Detects 94% of Cancers
    March 20, 2014 — A noninvasive test has been developed that is as good as a colonoscopy at detecting both precancerous and cancerous changes in the colon and rectum. This is welcome news for people age 50 and over who dread undergoing routine colonoscopies, which require bowel preparation and fasting.
     
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  3. Truthseeker420
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    Truthseeker420 Gold Member

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    [​IMG]
     
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  4. auditor0007
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    auditor0007 Gold Member

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    I had my first one last year. I had an anesthesiologist, so they knocked me out. I had an upper endoscopy at the same time. Found one small polyp which was removed and non-cancerous. The cleaning out was the worst of it for me, although I did develop hemorrhoids from the procedure that lasted for about two weeks. I know one thing; I would not want to wake up with that scope shoved up my ass. I don't blame you for insisting on being put under completely.
     
  5. Gracie
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    Gracie Diamond Member

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    I had one last year. I, too, woke up. I bent the bed rail.
    He wanted to do it again in a month and I said oh HAYELL NO. He said "I will use an anesthesiologist this time". I said [​IMG].

    He said "but I didn't get all the way up there!". I said too bad.
     
  6. Gracie
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    Gracie Diamond Member

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    Even with the pain, the prep is the worst. Drinking that nasty crap. HUGE jug of it. What is it..like 2 gallons? Half the night before, the rest the morning of..and having to drive and hope like hell all of it came out cuz if it didn't you arrive with a shit filled car and brown pants. I only drank half of mine. Had to drive 45 minutes the next morning to get to his office and there was no way I was gonna chance it.
    But he did say what little he saw was clean. Again, that's nice.
    I told him as I left his office "don't call me. I'll call you". And I haven't nor plan to.
     
  7. CaféAuLait
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    CaféAuLait This Space for Rent

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    Don't let Steve see this thread title, he will probably have an aneurism. :eek:
     
  8. Gracie
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    Gracie Diamond Member

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    Who is steve?
     
  9. CaféAuLait
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    CaféAuLait This Space for Rent

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  10. Gracie
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    Gracie Diamond Member

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    Oh. That guy. He IS a colonoscopy, lol.
     

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