Awkward moments in marriage

[bendog]

Trump "Rudy? What the fuck are you doing on TV?"


Rudy: "Hello?"

Trump: "I said what the fuck are you doing on TV?"

Rudy: "Well ... um ... I’m not really sure."

Trump: "What the fuck do you mean you’re not sure? I’m ALWAYS sure."

Rudy: "Well I don’t remember what I said."

Trump: "You don’t have to remember what you say. You just have to be certain no matter what you said."

Rudy: "But I’m not certain."

Trump: "You said I paid off more cockpockets. What the Fuck?"

Rudy: "Oh, Melania wouldn’t like that would she?"

Trump: "I got a pre-nup. I don’t give rat’s ass what she likes! I’M certain I don’t like hearing it!"

Rudy: "But did you pay off anymore cockpockets?"

Trump: "NO! Is that certain enough for you Dago Dick?"

Rudy: "Well, if you’re certain you’re certain.

 

[Hossfly]

Awkward moment in marriage:

You know the honeymoon is over when you're in the bathroom brushing your teeth and the bride comes in and takes a dump.