And you thought ALL rednecks live in the south! True Story ~

Discussion in 'Humor' started by Sunshine, Dec 25, 2011.

  1. Sunshine
    Offline

    Sunshine Trust the pie. Supporting Member

    Joined:
    Dec 17, 2009
    Messages:
    19,377
    Thanks Received:
    3,036
    Trophy Points:
    183
    Ratings:
    +3,045
    ABSOLUTELY A TRUE STORY HEARD ON A WISCONSIN RADIO STATION REPORTING ON THE INCIDENT.

    A guy buys a new Lincoln Navigator for $42,500.00 with monthly payments of $560.00. He and a friend go duck hunting in upper Wisconsin .

    It's mid-winter.............and of course all of the lakes are frozen.

    These two guys go out on the ice with their GUNS, a DOG, and of course the new NAVIGATOR. They decide they want to make a natural looking open water area for the ducks to focus on, something for the decoys to float on.

    Now..................making a hole in the ice large enough to invite a passing duck, is going to take a little more power than the average drill auger can produce.

    So........................ out of the back of the new Navigator comes a stick of dynamite with a short 40 second-fuse.

    Our two Rocket Scientists.....................afraid they might slip on the ice while trying to run away after lighting the fuse (and becoming toast, along with the Navigator), decide on the following course of action:

    they light the 40 second fuse; then, with a mighty thrust,
    they throw the stick of dynamite
    as far away as possible.

    Remember a couple of paragraphs back when I mentioned the NAVIGATOR, the GUNS, and the DOG...?

    Let's talk about the dog:

    A highly trained Black Lab used for RETRIEVING ; especially things thrown by the owner. You guessed it......................The dog takes off across the ice at a high rate of speed and grabs the stick of dynamite, with the burning 40-second fuse........................ just as it hits the ice.

    The two men swallow, blink, start waving their arms and, with veins in their necks swelling to resemble stalks of rhubarb, scream and holler at the dog to stop. The dog, now apparently cheered on by his master, keeps coming. One hunter panics, grabs the shotgun and shoots the dog. The shotgun is loaded with #8 bird shot, hardly big enough to stop a Black Lab.

    The dog stops for a moment, slightly confused, then continues on.
    Another shot, and this time the dog, still standing, becomes really confused and of course terrified, thinks these two geniuses have gone insane!!!!!!

    The dog takes off to find cover, UNDER the brand new Navigator.

    The men continue to scream as they run. The red hot exhaust pipe on the truck touches the dog's rear end..........................he yelps, drops the dynamite under the truck and takes off after his master.

    Then KA BOOOOOOOOOOOOM!

    The truck is blown to bits and sinks to the bottom of the lake, leaving the two idiots standing there with 'I can't believe this just happened' looks on their faces.

    The insurance company says that sinking a vehicle in a lake by illegal use of explosives is NOT COVERED by the policy. And he still had yet to make the first of those $560.00 a month payments.

    The dog is okay....doing fine.

    And to think you thought all Rednecks lived in the South .....
     
  2. editec
    Offline

    editec Mr. Forgot-it-All

    Joined:
    Jun 5, 2008
    Messages:
    41,427
    Thanks Received:
    5,598
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Location:
    Maine
    Ratings:
    +5,618
    Hilarious tale. Thanks for sharing.

    FYI, no the South doesn't have the monopoly on stupid.
     
  3. Mad Scientist
    Offline

    Mad Scientist Deplorable Gold Supporting Member Supporting Member

    Joined:
    Sep 15, 2008
    Messages:
    23,940
    Thanks Received:
    5,212
    Trophy Points:
    270
    Ratings:
    +7,684
  4. dblack
    Online

    dblack Gold Member

    Joined:
    May 21, 2011
    Messages:
    20,140
    Thanks Received:
    2,011
    Trophy Points:
    245
    Ratings:
    +3,789
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 18, 2014
  5. Sunshine
    Offline

    Sunshine Trust the pie. Supporting Member

    Joined:
    Dec 17, 2009
    Messages:
    19,377
    Thanks Received:
    3,036
    Trophy Points:
    183
    Ratings:
    +3,045
    You would not have thought it fake if it occurred in the South!
     
  6. strollingbones
    Offline

    strollingbones Diamond Member

    Joined:
    Aug 18, 2008
    Messages:
    65,657
    Thanks Received:
    15,626
    Trophy Points:
    2,190
    Location:
    chicken farm
    Ratings:
    +31,971
    yea the south is known for its fucking ice fishing.....fucking idiot
     
  7. Sunshine
    Offline

    Sunshine Trust the pie. Supporting Member

    Joined:
    Dec 17, 2009
    Messages:
    19,377
    Thanks Received:
    3,036
    Trophy Points:
    183
    Ratings:
    +3,045
    You're right! KY Lake has frozen solid enough to drive an SUV on it several times in my lifetime. Below is the most recent. But the ice was far more thick in 1973. People were out on it with their trucks the, as SUVs hadn't captured their attention yet.

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    http://www.explorekentuckylake.com/lakesarea/gallery/frozen_kentucky_lake.htm

    The same years in which KY Lake was frozen, our neighbor lake to the south Old Hickory Lake was similarly solid with ice.
     
    Last edited: Dec 25, 2011

Share This Page