Dear Barack, You had me at the first date, when you brought flowers and came to the door to collect me. Your manners were magnificent, and you were so articulate and fun to be with it wasn't long before I was in love. If you recall, I put out on our first date, even though you only sprang for hot dogs. But Barack it is over. Israel is my dear friend. I cannot be fucking a man who disrespects and hates on even one of my posse. I have burned all your tee-shirts and I am keeping the CDs you left at my house. O, and I wrote "ANTI-SEMITE" on your front lawn with grass killer...should show up in a few more days. I hope all your friends dump you too. My best friend, Bruce, yanno, is TOTALLY over your "issues" with gay people, so he said to tell you FUCK YOU too. O and my gf Cindy? The Native chick? She says to tell you "THANKS FOR FORGETTING ABOUT ARIZONA FUCKWAD". Besides, I have heard you cheated on me with Nancy Pelosi AND Hillary Clinton. How could you screw those skanky sluts? Never speak to me again, you fuckwhit. I'm telling all the other chicks at school you have crabs. Sincerely, Madeline, who Now Wishes To Apologize To America For her Vote P.S. I faked it. EVERY time.