Mr. P
VIP Member
Okay maybe this should be in Humor, but I don't think so...feel free..
News Anchor Dan Rather and Peter Jennings, NPR Reporter Cokie Roberts and
a U.S. Marine were hiking through the desert one day when they were
captured by Iraqis. They were tied up, led to the village and brought
before the leader.
The leader said, "I am familiar with your western custom of granting the
condemned a last wish. Before we kill and dismember you, do you have any
last requests?"
Dan Rather said, "Well, I'm a Texan; so I'd like one last bowl full of
hot, spicy chili." The leader nodded to an underling who left and returned
with the chili. Rather ate it all and said, "Now I can die content."
Peter Jennings said "I am Canadian; so I'd like to hear the English
National Anthem one last time". The leader nodded to a terrorist who
studied the
United States and knew the music was the same as to 'God Bless America'.
He returned with some rag-tag musicians and played the music. Jennings
sighed and declared he could now die peacefully.
Cokie Roberts said, "I'm a reporter to the end. I want to take out my tape
recorder and describe the scene here and what's about to happen. Maybe
someday someone will hear it and know that I was on the job till the end."
The leader directed an aide to hand over the tape recorder and Roberts
dictated some comments. She then said, "Now I can die happy."
The leader turned and said, "And now, Mr. U.S. Marine, what is your final
wish?"
"Kick me in the butt," said the Marine."
"What?" asked the leader. "Will you mock us in your last hour?"
"No, I'm not kidding. I want you to kick me in the butt," insisted the
Marine.
So the leader shoved him into the open, and kicked him in the butt. The
Marine went sprawling, but rolled to his knees, pulled a 9mm pistol from
inside his cammies, and shot the leader dead.
In the resulting confusion, he leapt to his knapsack, pulled out his M4
carbine, and sprayed the Iraqis with gunfire. In a flash, the Iraqis were
dead or fleeing for their lives.
As the Marine was untying Rather, Jennings and Roberts, they asked him,
"Why didn't you just shoot them? Why did you ask them to kick you in the
butt?"
"What?" said the Marine, "And have you three jackasses call ME the
aggressor??!!"
News Anchor Dan Rather and Peter Jennings, NPR Reporter Cokie Roberts and
a U.S. Marine were hiking through the desert one day when they were
captured by Iraqis. They were tied up, led to the village and brought
before the leader.
The leader said, "I am familiar with your western custom of granting the
condemned a last wish. Before we kill and dismember you, do you have any
last requests?"
Dan Rather said, "Well, I'm a Texan; so I'd like one last bowl full of
hot, spicy chili." The leader nodded to an underling who left and returned
with the chili. Rather ate it all and said, "Now I can die content."
Peter Jennings said "I am Canadian; so I'd like to hear the English
National Anthem one last time". The leader nodded to a terrorist who
studied the
United States and knew the music was the same as to 'God Bless America'.
He returned with some rag-tag musicians and played the music. Jennings
sighed and declared he could now die peacefully.
Cokie Roberts said, "I'm a reporter to the end. I want to take out my tape
recorder and describe the scene here and what's about to happen. Maybe
someday someone will hear it and know that I was on the job till the end."
The leader directed an aide to hand over the tape recorder and Roberts
dictated some comments. She then said, "Now I can die happy."
The leader turned and said, "And now, Mr. U.S. Marine, what is your final
wish?"
"Kick me in the butt," said the Marine."
"What?" asked the leader. "Will you mock us in your last hour?"
"No, I'm not kidding. I want you to kick me in the butt," insisted the
Marine.
So the leader shoved him into the open, and kicked him in the butt. The
Marine went sprawling, but rolled to his knees, pulled a 9mm pistol from
inside his cammies, and shot the leader dead.
In the resulting confusion, he leapt to his knapsack, pulled out his M4
carbine, and sprayed the Iraqis with gunfire. In a flash, the Iraqis were
dead or fleeing for their lives.
As the Marine was untying Rather, Jennings and Roberts, they asked him,
"Why didn't you just shoot them? Why did you ask them to kick you in the
butt?"
"What?" said the Marine, "And have you three jackasses call ME the
aggressor??!!"
