Actual Writings On Charts In Hospitals

Discussion in 'Humor' started by Johnney, Oct 24, 2004.

  1. Johnney
    Offline

    Johnney Senior Member

    Joined:
    Dec 9, 2003
    Messages:
    4,330
    Thanks Received:
    141
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Location:
    IOWA
    Ratings:
    +141
    1. The patient refused autopsy.

    2. The patient has no previous history of suicides.

    3. Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.

    4. Patient's medical history has been remarkably insignificant
    with only a 40 pound weight gain in the past three days.

    5. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states
    she was very hot in bed last night.

    6. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.

    7. On the second day the knee was better and on the third day
    it disappeared.

    8. The patient is tearful and crying constantly.
    She also appears to be depressed.

    9.The patient has been depressed since she began
    seeing me in 1993.

    10. Discharge status: Alive, but without my permission.

    11. Healthy appearing decrepit 69-year old male, mentally
    alert, but forgetful

    12. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.

    13. She is numb from her toes down.

    14. While in ER, she was examined, x-rated and sent home.

    15. The skin was moist and dry.

    16. Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.

    17. Patient was alert and unresponsive.

    18. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.

    19. She stated that she had been constipated for most
    of her life until she got a divorce.

    20. I saw your patient today, who is still under our car
    for physical therapy.

    21. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light
    and accommodation.

    22. Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized

    23. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.

    24. Skin: somewhat pale. but present.

    25. The pelvic exam will be done later on the floor.

    26. Large brown stool ambulating in the hall.

    27. Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities.
     
  2. Joz
    Offline

    Joz Senior Member

    Joined:
    Mar 9, 2004
    Messages:
    3,392
    Thanks Received:
    221
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Ratings:
    +221
    :teeth:
     
  3. Merlin1047
    Offline

    Merlin1047 Senior Member

    Joined:
    Mar 28, 2004
    Messages:
    3,500
    Thanks Received:
    449
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Location:
    AL
    Ratings:
    +450
    DAMN!!!!!!!!!!
     
  4. Johnney
    Offline

    Johnney Senior Member

    Joined:
    Dec 9, 2003
    Messages:
    4,330
    Thanks Received:
    141
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Location:
    IOWA
    Ratings:
    +141
    deep and thorough on that one!!
     
  5. wolvie20m
    Offline

    wolvie20m Member

    Joined:
    Oct 20, 2004
    Messages:
    643
    Thanks Received:
    26
    Trophy Points:
    16
    Location:
    Seattle, Wa
    Ratings:
    +26
    Hmmm...and they call themseleves doctors?
     
  6. Shattered
    Online

    Shattered Guest

    Ratings:
    +0
    :eek2:
     
  7. lilcountriegal
    Offline

    lilcountriegal Senior Member

    Joined:
    Oct 24, 2003
    Messages:
    1,633
    Thanks Received:
    59
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Location:
    Pennsylvania
    Ratings:
    +59
    I CAN RELATE!
     
    • Thank You! Thank You! x 1
  8. UsaPride
    Offline

    UsaPride Senior Member

    Joined:
    Mar 13, 2004
    Messages:
    3,939
    Thanks Received:
    198
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Location:
    NC
    Ratings:
    +198
    LMAO!!! :bow2:
     

Share This Page