A serious discussion, I need some feedback

[Againsheila]

I think it's safe to say I feel a certain guilt about it, but not enough to ruin my relationship with anyone. I know that I love the girl, and I would do anything for her and always be there for her. That's good enough for me.

On the real, I just wish she was mine biologically so this didn't have to even be an issue.

At the very least, I think that I wish I had been there from birth. It was a pretty tough situation coming into her life when she was 2 years old (going on 40).

You don't just automatically fall deeply in love with a child. It took a while for our relationship to develop into what it is today. I'm still the guy who simply replaces her real dad, I know that's how she looks at it, regardless of how much she loves me.

She still thinks her dad is just "away" and "just can't make it here", and whatever. There will be a time when she's older where the truth of the situation can be explained more to her, but for now she doesn't really need to know being only 6 years old. She's a happy girl and she's fine without the guy.

As I said before, you probably feel different towards your son because he's a boy. Men often feel differently towards their sons than they do their daughters, it doesn't mean they love them any less, just differently. I have two boys and they are very different and I love them both, but my love for each is unique to them.

 

[Samson]

I think it's safe to say I feel a certain guilt about it, but not enough to ruin my relationship with anyone. I know that I love the girl, and I would do anything for her and always be there for her. That's good enough for me.

On the real, I just wish she was mine biologically so this didn't have to even be an issue.

At the very least, I think that I wish I had been there from birth. It was a pretty tough situation coming into her life when she was 2 years old (going on 40).

You don't just automatically fall deeply in love with a child.

You got that right.



Wait until they're teenagers.

 

[xsited1]

Kind of a shot in the dark though, considering it would require much more information about someone to diagnose a disorder like that.

There certainly isn't just one single criteria for diagnosing aspbergers

It was a shot in the dark, but I was only trying to help. The fact that you discuss your feelings with your girlfriend about her daughter in this way is truly pathetic. Some things you just need to keep to yourself.

 

[Samson]

Kind of a shot in the dark though, considering it would require much more information about someone to diagnose a disorder like that.

There certainly isn't just one single criteria for diagnosing aspbergers

It was a shot in the dark, but I was only trying to help. The fact that you discuss your feelings with your girlfriend about her daughter in this way is truly pathetic. Some things you just need to keep to yourself.

You need to begin a thread about, "Things You Just Need To Keep To Yourself."

(excluding Octoerotic Art)

 

[RadiomanATL]

I need some feedback

AA+++++ Would troll again.

 

[Ravi]

If you think it won't get back to her you are probably wrong.

btw, every time you bring her up here you make a point of letting us know that she isn't your biological daughter and what enrichment you are bringing to her life.

That's a selfish attitude, imo, and you really need to stop it.

 

[Anguille]

Now I getting worried that Paulie likes Ravi better than me. I heard a rumor that he does.

 

[Ravi]

Now I getting worried that Paulie likes Ravi better than me. I heard a rumor that he does.

Who doesn't?

 

[JWBooth]

I have two children, one is my 2 year old son, and the other is my 6 year old daughter. My daughter is not mine biologically. I've been her father figure since she was 2.

I love the little girl with all my heart, I would do anything for her and will always be there for her, even if my relationship with her mother ever went sour and we split up.

The conundrum, and something I've had an issue with her mother on since day one, is that when I look at my son I have a certain feeling for him that isn't there with my daughter. It's a subconscious thing, and something I just can't help.

My son is ME. He's a little version of me. He has my dad, my mom, etc. There's just something that's uniquely special about that.

Everyone who knows me and knows this situation has nothing but the utmost amount of respect for me for being a father to a child that isn't mine, and whenever a discussion about this situation happens, I always tell people about this difference in "feelings". Everyone understands.

Except the girl's mother. She doesn't understand why I don't have the same "feeling" towards her as I do my son. Well, she says she "half understands", whatever that means.

What do you think about this? Is there something wrong with me not having that same feeling? There's the old cliche "there are many different types of love", and as cheesy as it is, it makes sense to me in this case.

What say you? Because quite frankly it's getting old that I'm continually guilted about this. I don't think she'll ever really understand unless she was actually in this situation herself, with a child she's raising not being hers biologically, so I'm willing to cut her some slack because of that.

Feedback on this would be greatly appreciated though.

Thanks.

I'm in the same situation, only my girl was 7 when I married her mother and she is 17 now. I love her with all my heart, but I wasn't there to hold her when she was born. I do have the advantage that her mother understands and its ok there. Biology, maybe. Those missing years, possibly. Only out of respect for her grandparents have we not gone forward for full adoption. Its not like her sperm donor "daddy" gives a damn. Do your best, love 'em both as much as you can. I think you'll do o.k.

 

[Paulie]

Kind of a shot in the dark though, considering it would require much more information about someone to diagnose a disorder like that.

There certainly isn't just one single criteria for diagnosing aspbergers

It was a shot in the dark, but I was only trying to help. The fact that you discuss your feelings with your girlfriend about her daughter in this way is truly pathetic. Some things you just need to keep to yourself.

Truly pathetic?

Suck a fucking dick you piece of shit.

Truly pathetic is running out to Best Buy to immediately replace your kids' TV so god forbid they don't miss their disney shows that night.

Fucking faggot.