A punny thing happened on the way to the Forum

[Liability]

A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.

 

[Two Thumbs]

I don't get it.

 

[boedicca]

The Best Pun EVAH:

Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and, with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him:

A super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

 

[syrenn]

A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.

And dont forget possibly two or three years.

 

[Liability]

That's like the poor bastard who got tossed in a cell for months with nothing but a mattress and a calendar, yet who survived until he was released:

He ate the dates on the calendar and drank from the springs in the mattress.

 

[boedicca]

A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel, and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office, and asked them to disperse.

"But why," they asked, as they moved off.

"Because," he said. "I can't stand chess-nuts boasting in an open foyer."