A Petition to Stop Divorce?

All I know is that I think Cecilie1200 is way over due for getting laid. LOL!
And that's all I'm going to say. Now back to giving this place the silent treatment ....
 
Try reading before you puke all over the board. You're still getting your people confused, dumbshit.

I still don't care. You're wallowing in self-pity. I'm not getting paid to hear it. Ergo, it doesn't matter to me WHAT you sob over.
 
:rofl:

Yeah, I can't imagine why you have difficulty conducting successful life relationships, what with thinking you're going to make friends via an anonymous message board on the Internet. Even if I WERE stupid enough to think, "I believe I'll try to become lifelong bosom buddies with a total stranger online", I wouldn't have chosen you, because then I'd have to listen to this belly-aching and self-pity all the time. This way, at least I can just ignore you when you become too annoying.

Once again. You laid all this crap out here for everyone to see and pick through. I didn't mysteriously read your mind. You're just pissed off that you expected everyone to say, "Oh, you poor dear. You've suffered so much. You're right, divorce SHOULD be easy so that little angels like you, who've been victimized through no fault of their own, can escape." Now that you instead got told that you and your parents bear some of the responsibility for your lousy life, you're outraged that anyone would DARE to comment on your life.

Really, you are like a textbook of relationship and inappropriate intimacy issues.

lol, you need to get a life or a job.
 
Oh, yes. I'm in a frenzy to be heard and acknowledged. That's why I'M the one who got all nasty and vituperative about "My parents were horrible, and divorce is a good thing, and HOW DARE YOU SAY OTHERWISE!" Oh, wait. I wasn't. I was the one who said that you can't outlaw divorce completely, which you then repeated at the end of the post in which you had kittens over how attacked you felt as though you were saying something deep and profound that I hadn't considered.

Project much, sweetie?

And I just love the "I didn't tell you about my life. I only told you about my crappy childhood. That's not my life."

Of course I don't make much effort to keep straight which one of you is sniveling about what. That's because I didn't ask, and don't care, and would be immensely grateful if you would either stop telling me, or pay me the same rate you're giving your therapist to listen to this crap.

If your only intent is to troll responses, spewing hatred as fast as you possibly can, rather than read them and responding accordingly, and then make some smartass comment when you're called on your mistake, I suggest you find yourself a new board.

If you're actually here to discuss, feel free to stay.
 
Cecilie Wrote:


You said far more than that - which is why I think you're seeing the responses you've been seeing.

Yeah, I did. And I stand by everything I said.

I agree with you that sometimes people get married to the wrong people because they aren't careful. But sometimes, people marry people they think they love - and those people turn out to be abusive shits...

I'm sorry, but those aren't two different situations you're talking about. Marrying someone you think you love and having him turn out to be abusive IS marrying the wrong person because you aren't careful.

Like I said, unless the guy is schizophrenic or sustained a head injury, he didn't just magically turn into a completely different person one day.

This is not to say that I think people should either be perfect or just have to suffer the consequences of their mistakes. That's why even the Bible allows for divorce in certain circumstances.

By the way, I am vehemently opposed to the whole concept of "marrying for love". Forming a commitment like that based on emotion seems to me to be a recipe for disaster. I believe that love should be the RESULT of marriage, not the cause of it.

I agree with you that parents have to be role models in marriage - and that a big reason divorce is becoming so common is because we are losing examples of people who make the decision every day to make their marriages work.

But I think it some instances, far fewer than people actually want to admit, but in some instances....divorce is the best and necessary option.

I agree. Humans are fallible creatures, and you should be able to rectify mistakes when - not if - they happen.

I think there was probably a far nicer way to say what you were trying to say...but, as I said before, I agree with you that if people are going to bring their personal lives to the table...they shouldn't be surprised when their personal lives become the subject of the conversation.

I originally DID say it nicely, and in a completely generic fashion, not aimed at anyone. I was completely serious when I said that some people overreact that way to any perceived criticism because, deep down, they believe they might deserve it.
 
All I know is that I think Cecilie1200 is way over due for getting laid. LOL!
And that's all I'm going to say. Now back to giving this place the silent treatment ....

Spoken like someone who's never been viewed as the solution to sexual frustration.
 
If your only intent is to troll responses, spewing hatred as fast as you possibly can, rather than read them and responding accordingly, and then make some smartass comment when you're called on your mistake, I suggest you find yourself a new board.

If you're actually here to discuss, feel free to stay.

Nice try. Well, no, it wasn't.

Now that you and Gigi have both admitted that I'm right and flounced off to sulk, perhaps the rest of us can get back to discussing the topic instead of having to hear your little group-therapy sessions.
 
Nice try. Well, no, it wasn't.

Now that you and Gigi have both admitted that I'm right and flounced off to sulk, perhaps the rest of us can get back to discussing the topic instead of having to hear your little group-therapy sessions.

Next time I'll put it in red for you.
 
Spoken like someone who's never been viewed as the solution to sexual frustration.

:lol:
Unlike you whose photo is treasured by men trying hard to practice abstinence?

Cece, you're a hoot!
 
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Cecile, You gave advice I never asked for. I simply agreed with a "friend" (suddenly I have to be made to feel guilty for making friends on a message board as well --as if it were some mortal sin) and I gave an example of why I "empathized" and suddenly I have to get free therapy from someone whom I would NEVER in two million years ever choose as a friend with a condescending attitude like you or hire as a therapist!

No, seriously, what were you doing fighting in front of your children?

Your girls might not be spoiled and self-indulgent, but it sounds like you might have been.​

Your opening words. ANYONE who got talked to like this by someone....would become defensive. Normal reaction. I did.

But now I have to have Gem chime in a make me feel guilty for being defensive because I got "personal"? It's my prerogative if I want to get personal or not. I personally don't have fear of people knowing my life. If you do, then that's your problem but don't try and make me feel guilty or project your fears on me.

Now I will give my opinion. Cecilie, you are a frustrated woman who isn't a real psychologist or analyst because if you were you would charge for your services and would not be giving out free advice in your free time to people who didn't ask for it when you could be making friends and chitchatting and having FUN while you work like most people in here do. Instead you are either very lonely or very bored in your life.... or no one will hire you because no one really wants to be around people who make them feel bad about themselves

Happy Cat has run out of happy. I think that says a lot about you. Get yourself happy and leave the rest of us alone.
 
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What in the name of God were you doing getting married at 16?

well my real dad was a drug dealer/hairdresser and he did a lot of bad things
in vegas and I didnt want to be around him anymore so when my husband was so sweet to me I thought I was in love and we got married, I thought I would be protected from dealing with my dad, I was really immature. To be honest with you I wish I had never married him and made better choices like you. I have alot of regret and it is my fault. Im just glad we never had kids. Now the 2nd ex husband I had kids with but he started sleeping around ALOT, I wanted to work it out but he didnt want to and so he ended it. I have been alone now since 2000 and I don't date at all. I just raise my kids alone. It is hard on them because of choices me and my ex made. I really can't disagree with you on that.
 
:lol:
Unlike you whose photo is treasured by men trying hard to practice abstinence?

Cece, you're a hoot!

Cece, I hope I didn't make you flounce off to sulk with my crass comment but since you went and laid all your crap out there for everyone to see; your business-like marriage where you and your husband treat each other like supervisor and employee, your parent's passionless relationship, your lives of quiet desperation ... I can't help but to butt in and suggest you loosen up your girdle chickie.
Before it's too late.:cheeky-smiley-018:
 
I didn't say anything about "pretend to like each other", sweet cheeks. You're still acting like I think their emotional fuzzies are important. I said they should behave like rational, civilized adults who recognize that when you make a small human being who is dependent upon you, your bliss with the universe takes a backseat.

I've always found tht someone who is happy in their life is a better parent. I don't mean going out with the girls/boys every night happy... but I do mean someone who is at peace with the world.

I hate to break it to you, but marriage is NOT about "emotional fulfillment".

No. Emotional fulfilment comes from inside. Marriage is only a part of that. And no one should be in an unhappy marriage or mistreated.


That other adult is your business partner, your co-worker, your team mate that you work with to get shit done in life. If you can sit on your distaste for the guy in the next cubicle every day of your working life and be polite to him in order to keep a job, then you can DAMNED well maintain a civil working relationship with the person you made a baby with.

What a sad life someone would live if that was all they had.

I'm not saying you have to play huggy-smoochy-face for the kiddies, because I can promise you they don't care. I AM saying that if you can refrain from screaming invective at your dipwad supervisor and put in the effort to find calm, diplomatic ways to get your job done, then you can take your spouse aside into the bedroom and discuss your problems in the same tone of voice, instead of shrieking at each other in front of God and everyone in a glorious display of childish self-indulgence.

You do know that a big part of being a good parent is teaching your child how to be in a relationship.... businesslike isn't quite what I would recommend.


Yeah, that direct quote from Wallerstein herself certainly shows that I "misinterpreted" her work.

And of course, someone as supercilious and judgmental actually read the criticisms of Wallerstein's work that I linked, right?

Pssst... hint... people don't criticize their own hypotheses. And yes, lots of people misinterpret her work. As I showed you, there are limitations to her research.

Horse hockey. People govern themselves all the time in every other aspect of their daily lives, but somehow, they suddenly revert to wailing babies with dirty diapers when it comes to their marriages?

Does one have to be a wailing baby to be in a bad relationship? How about one where you're treated with disrespect? You think a daughter should see another woman demeaned? How about your son? Do you think he should be taught that women are possessions who need to be forced into submission? At what point in such a relationship does it become acceptable to you for a woman to do more good by walking away than staying?


You'll excuse me if I point out that you seem to have a vested interest in people treating their marriages like disposable napkins, what with your professional life being tied up in divorce and all.

Actually, again, if you bothered reading, you will note that I *did* divorces. I no longer do that area of practice. My obervations are based on what I saw. And I have never seen anyone worse off after divorce than before.

Only "limitation" I can see to those conclusions is the fact that you might be taking a pay cut if more people grow the hell up.

And of course, that's an appropriate answer in your little 1950's world, where women should wear pearls while cleaning and have a hot dinner on the stove for hubby along with his gin and tonic when he walks in the door smoking his Lucky Strike. :cuckoo:

As I said, I don't practice in the area any more. So my salary's pretty safe regardless of how many divorces occur.

But have you ever heard the expression "walk a mile in the other guy's shoes"?

You seem to have been out the day they gave that lesson.
 
cecilie, you are a world class bitch. :clap2:

You really should seek therapy...I have a hunch that you are just trying to convince yourself that a life of misery is your own fault.

Sad, really.
 
oh, and cecilie? If your marriage is really as bad as it sounds and you are sticking with it out of some misguided notion that your misery is meaningless, you are teaching your son two lessons.

One, that his happiness is more important than ANYONE ELSE'S. That is how tyrants are born.

Two, that his future wife can be treated as badly as he wishes to treat her, and if she objects...it's her fault, not his.

I feel sorry for you.
 
I do hope that you are kidding about the petition thing. Even for Christians who abhor divorce Jesus does allow it. I won't go into the specifics and quote those scriptures. And I can agree that some people make divorce a life hobby with no regard for others. But I hope this petition never becomes law.
 
I dont think the gay & lesbian community is serious with the petition.
 

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