Old man in red hat: "What did she say? I shoulda changed the batteries in my hearing aid...and dang it!!! I forgot my glasses too!"

Old lady in red jacket: "Oh good lord, now he's going to want sex when we get home! I hope he forgot his glasses again!"

Old guy in white hat (behind old guy in red hat): "YEEEHAWWW!! Nice rack!"

Little girl next to old lady: "I wonder if she knows she has a booger hanging out of her nose?"

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"Why, it appears that we appointed all of our worst generals to command the armies and we appointed all of our best generals to edit the newspapers. I mean, I found by reading a newspaper that these editor generals saw all of the defects plainly from the start but didn't tell me until it was too late. I'm willing to yield my place to these best generals and I'll do my best for the cause by editing a newspaper." -- Gen. Robert E. Lee